Here’s a hard truth that’ll piss off half the owners reading this: your adult store isn’t slow because people suddenly hate orgasms. It’s slow because your staff treats customers like they’re window-shopping at a damn gas station.
I’ve watched it a thousand times. Dude walks in, eyes darting, clearly nervous but curious as hell. Clerk barely looks up from their phone: “Let me know if you need anything.” Boom—guy grabs the cheapest lube and bolts. Could’ve been a $400 sale on a high-end wand and some cuffs. Instead? Twenty bucks and gone forever.
The Real Game-Changer in Adult Store Sales Isn’t Inventory—It’s Vibe
People don’t come to us for vibrating plastic. They come for permission. Permission to want more, to explore, to not feel like a creep for liking what they like. Give them that feeling and they’ll hand you their credit card like it’s burning a hole in their pocket.
Ditch the Robot Script, Start a Real Conversation
Stop training staff to vomit specs. Nobody gives a shit if it’s 10 speeds or 12 when they’re standing there blushing.
Teach them this instead:
- “What kind of fun are you chasing tonight?”
- “Is this for solo missions or bringing someone else along for the ride?”
- “Last week someone bought this exact toy and texted me the next day saying their neighbors filed a noise complaint… in the best way.”
That last one? Gold. Suddenly it’s not a sale—it’s a conspiracy. They’re in on the joke. They relax. Wallet opens.
Treat Every Browser Like They’re Already Spending $300
Biggest mistake I see? Staff acting like the customer is “just looking.” Guess what—that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Flip it. Assume the sale. Walk up with energy like they’re your oldest friend who just won the lottery:
“Oh my god, you HAVE to feel this new We-Vibe—they finally fixed the app issues and it’s stupid powerful. Here, hold it. Tell me that doesn’t feel dangerous in the best way.”
Hand-to-hand contact with the toy breaks the ice faster than anything. Now they’re invested. Now they’re imagining using it. Now they’re asking you which lube pairs best instead of edging toward the door.
Your Store Is a Stage, Not a Showroom
Best performing shops I’ve ever stepped into feel like walking into someone’s very kinky living room. Music with a pulse. Staff laughing about something filthy that just happened. A $600 glass dildo displayed like it’s the Hope Diamond under a spotlight.
Make it theatrical:
- Put the gag gifts front and center—laughter is lube for the soul.
- Wrap luxury toys in silk like they’re jewelry (because at that price, they are).
- Have “tester” bottles of flavored lube open. Let people taste. Watch sales triple.
Word of Mouth Still Crushes Any Ad Spend
Paid ads are fighting Meta’s prudish algorithms and payment processors who hate us. You know what still works like 2010? Sarah telling her best friend:
“Dude, go to that shop on 5th. The girl there spent 20 minutes helping me pick a strap-on for my boyfriend and made me laugh so hard I snorted. Zero judgment. I dropped $450 and I’m going back next week.”
That referral is worth more than any Google Ad you’ll ever buy. Create experiences worth texting about.
Authenticity or Bust
Stop posting sterile product shots on Instagram. Nobody connects with a vibrator on a white background.
Post the real shit:
- Your clerk holding a giant rainbow dick candle with the caption “Kevin’s birthday gift sorted.”
- A blurry story of the staff doing shots after closing because you just broke your monthly record.
- You, the owner, at Pride with your shop banner looking like you’re having the time of your life.
People buy from people, not brands. Especially when the product is going up their ass.
Bottom line? Foot traffic means jack shit if your staff can’t close. Train them to connect, not recite. Create an atmosphere that feels like foreplay. Treat every customer like they’re already your favorite regular.
Do that, and watch your adult store sales stop being a prayer and start being a flex.
