Picture this: it’s 2007, and two badass women roll into Albuquerque with a dream so wild it’d make your grandma blush. Matie Fricker and Molly Adler didn’t just open a sex shop—they built a goddamn sex-positive empire called Self Serve. Eighteen years later, it’s still standing tall in New Mexico’s Nob Hill, slinging dildos, vibes, and a whole lotta empowerment. How the hell did they pull it off? Buckle up, because this ain’t your average retail tale.
From Boston to Burque: The Origin Story
Fricker and Adler didn’t stumble into this gig. They cut their teeth at Grand Opening!, a Boston-area adult store that lit a fire under them. Fricker remembers clocking in and thinking, “Holy shit, this is social change!” Helping folks embrace their bodies—raw, real, unapologetic—felt like a calling. Adler was on the same wavelength. But they didn’t just jump in blind. These two spent a full year scouting spots, hell-bent on finding a city that needed their vibe without stepping on other shops’ toes. Albuquerque? Perfect fit.
Building a Sex-Positive Fortress
Self Serve didn’t mess around when it opened its doors on New Year’s Day 2007. This wasn’t some sleazy back-alley joint—it was a legit sexuality resource center. Toys? Sure. Lingerie? You bet. But also classes on banging better, guides for safer sex, even emergency contraception tips. Hell, they’ve got resources for the homeless too. Fricker and Adler wanted a space where anyone could walk in, no judgment, and leave feeling like a goddamn king or queen of their own pleasure. And it worked—fast.
“We really wanted to come to a community that needed a place like ours.”
– Matie Fricker
By 2008, they’d snagged the Tough Cookie Award from the National Association of Women Business Owners. Albuquerque’s Alibi Weekly crowned them Best Sexy Shop for a decade straight. Pride gave ‘em a nod too. This wasn’t just a store; it was a movement.
The Secret Sauce: Testing Toys Like Pros
Here’s where Self Serve gets nerdy—and I mean that in the best way. Every single toy gets put through the wringer before hitting the shelves. New Mexico’s crawling with engineers and scientists, and Fricker tapped that brain trust for her testing crew. These aren’t randos either—they’re folks who already know their way around a vibe or an air-pulse toy. Why? Because some newbie fumbling with a clitoral stimulator ain’t gonna give the sharp feedback manufacturers need. Design and function? Non-negotiable. Especially now, with inflation screwing everyone, customers want toys that scream quality.
Fricker’s team doesn’t just play with the goods—they talk back to the makers. Honest, no-BS critiques. “It’s hard to make shit,” she admits, but she’s not here to burn bridges. She’s an ally, not an enemy. That’s how you build a roster of gear that actually delivers.
Community: The Real Backbone
Self Serve’s been through the ringer—zoning fights, smashed windows, COVID hell. But every time the shit hits the fan, Albuquerque shows up. “We get broken into, or some asshole trashes us online, and bam—support floods in,” Fricker says. That’s not luck; that’s community. She’s tight with other shop owners too—daily Google group chats with four badass retailers across the country. No lone wolf crap here.
And the staff? Pure gold. After Adler split in 2014 to become a sex therapist badass, Fricker’s been running the show solo—but never alone. Her team’s trained to handle any question, from “Which lube’s best for anal?” to “How do I talk to my partner about this kink?” No shame, all game.
Why It Matters in 2025
Look, sex positivity ain’t just a buzzword—it’s a lifeline. With the world going nuts—tariffs, climate chaos, rights under fire—pleasure’s not a luxury, it’s survival. Self Serve’s proving that brick-and-mortar adult shops can do more than sell silicone cocks. They’re shaping how we fuck, feel, and fight back. Want proof? Check out the sex-positive movement—it’s bigger than you think.
Fricker’s not slowing down either. She’s got her finger on the pulse—literally and figuratively. “The shop means nothing without the people,” she says. Damn right. Self Serve’s a testament to what happens when you mix grit, smarts, and a shit-ton of heart.
Takeaways for the Hustlers
Thinking of jumping into the adult game? Here’s the Self Serve playbook:
- Know your shit—test products like your life depends on it.
- Build a crew that’s ride-or-die, from staff to community.
- Don’t just sell—educate, empower, connect.
Matie Fricker’s not just running a store—she’s rewriting the rules of the pleasure biz. Albuquerque’s lucky as hell to have her.
